Our home has shared space with delightful, feathered friends for decades. A friendly cockatiel has been part of the family for over 13 years. We acquired him very young, so knowing his precise ‘hatch-day’ was impossible.
Photo: Werlley Meira, pexels.com
It turned out that before a certain age, to positively determine his gender was equally impossible. Naming him ‘Joe’ or Joey got its inspiration from Joe Cocker – the gravelly English singer of a bygone era (our bird became… Joe Cocker-tiel). We’d been assured Joey was a boy by a bird expert. But experts are often wrong. Years later with male Joe ensconced in our lives, an egg turned up in the bottom of his large cage. I laughed thinking my wife had devised a pathetic wee joke. She’d seen the egg and thought I was playing the same trick. It stayed there, until another one came. That’s when we addressed the “‘cocker-tiel’ in the room”..!
Murray Smith
Joe is who she is biologically – not what gender we’d imposed on her. The mental shift was assisted by accepting she was still Joey, although now was Josephine! Following that adjustment of years ago, Joey has laid many eggs – up to three at a time.
She’s a characterful, adventurous little bird. She loves house-time, flying around the home, escaping once through a door blown open by a gust of wind. I recovered her later sitting up high on a neighbour’s roof. I’ve been very careful since.
Before Joey, we’d hoped our beautiful blue Indian Ring-Necked parrot would become a prolific talker. The problem was all that came from ‘Bluey’s’ bright red beak was screeching. He had lots of positive attention but screeched nonstop, irritating the household immensely. Months of screeching compelled me to return him reluctantly to the bird shop for re-sale on behalf.
A week went by and missing him greatly, I went to ‘visit’.
I walked up to the cage and said, ‘Hello Bluey!’ Matter of factly he said, ‘Hello Murray.’ A staff member reported he had been talking lots.
Maybe our kid’s frazzled nerves, leading them to shout ‘shut up’ at Bluey had provoked his incessant screeching… anyway, while never talking for us, I’m glad he showed he could- for his new home.
This ‘bird-brained’ piece has a point. It’s about expectations. My expectations of the two birds I’ve mentioned, were misplaced. Do you recognise how frequently and easily we do this with people in our lives…? We’re inclined to pigeon-hole people (forgive the pun)… forcing upon them roles and expectations they’re not meant for.
A 1989 movie, “The Dead Poets Society” carries the theme of a son in an elite boarding school who develops a passionate dream of life involvement in the arts. A controlling father refuses to release this son to pursue a life in dramatic arts, imposing instead, his own agendas on the boy.
Discovering who we are, must be built on a foundation of truth and reality. That only comes from God who has purposeful plans for everyone… never over-riding our personality, manipulating or crushing us, He lovingly waits. Discovering by faith that His plans for us are perfect, we discover who we are.
Pigeon-holed. Photo: René Lussi, pexels.com
